‘Pay the fee and I'll drive you home’: Employee demands coworkers for money after months of driving them around for free, they accuse him of being selfish in response

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Oct 28, 2024 10:00 AM EDT

A person's relationship with the people they work with can be tricky to handle. On the one hand, despite seeing them every day, those people are not really your friends, they are simply… people you see every day. On the other hand, and stay with me on this one, these are people you see every day, so you might want to be on good terms with them, and not create an awkward situation at the office.

That is why I understand this employee's initial instinct to be kind to his coworkers by offering them rides home from work. If it doesn't cost you anything, and you don't go out of your way to do it, then sure, it is a nice thing to do. However, in this case, giving rides to his coworkers does cost OP (original poster) something – gas. This led OP to tell his coworkers that he would only drive them if they paid him for the gas it costs, but they found this request extremely out of line.

Keep scrolling to read the full story. After that, check out this story of a manager who demanded employee arrive at work 30 minutes before clocking in.

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    AIRBAG a MM NO DISC CLEAR TEL 3150 FORS TUV
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  • 02
    AITA because i refuse to drive my coworkers home without compensation?
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  • 03
    I (25M) have been offering/accepting requests from coworkers to give them a lift home whenever possible. I never asked for any compensation since it is only about a 15-20-minute detour.
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    But, about a month ago, I finally had the opportunity to buy a new car. Beforehand, I had a 1999 Ford Fiesta; it was my first car, and I barely spent any money on gas.
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    I don't have many financial responsibilities, so I chose to enjoy being a young man with a decent salary and bought a supercar. I LOVE my new car, and so do my coworkers, which means a lot more requests
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    started coming my way for lifts home. I've worked at my current job for about 6 months, and I've probably done over 100 detours to make my coworkers happy.
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    Here's the problem; not ONCE have I been offered any form of compensation from any of them, even though they would've had to pay for public transport, if I didn't offer them a lift.
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    Now, my new car is quite a bit more expensive than my old one, which means it does not drive that far km/l (approx 12-13 km/l). Apparently, this is completely otherworldly for my coworkers. Today,
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    I said no for the first time. I got asked if I could give them a lift, and I said: (sure, if you pay me the fee you would have to for public transport, I'll drive you home), and this did not sit well with them.
    via PleaseDonatePot
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    I think I'm being as fair as possible, since I don't want to keep losing money by giving them a free service, that they don't seem to appreciate. So, AITA because I won't give free lifts to my coworkers anymore, since it's becoming a financial burden on me?
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    HappyFlounder7236 10h ago • ΝΤΑ But it's weird you're calling it compensation or a fee and that might be turning people off. Normally people ask for gas money - basics rule of etiquette in car pooling is always offering gas money.
    via HappyFlounder7236
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    Please DonatePot OP • 9h ago • I had difficulty finding another English word for compensation/fee since English is my 4th language, and I thought this would make my point come across more clearly, when explaining the situation in another language; but I get what you mean!
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    . HappyFlounder7236 8h ago • Oh, it's just a little lost in translation thing. That's an easy fix! Let your coworkers know that you didn't use the best choice of words and that the new car goes through way more gas than before and the extra lifts is costing you a bit more now. Let
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    them know you really enjoy their company, but was hoping they could throw in a few bucks for gas money so you can keep commutung together. Aside: 4th language and rocking it!
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    archetyping 101 • 10h ago • Craptain [192] NTA but I think it's how you said it that didn't sit well. It would have been ok if you said "hey, I should have mentioned this earlier but after giving lifts out of the way for so long, I do need $x because of the detour and gas. I'm sure you understand".
    via archetyping
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    I used to give lifts all the time and they'd either pay for groceries (we'd shop after work) or they would buy me lunch or dinner. To have done this so many times. and been offered absolutely nothing is bananas.
    via archetyping
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    Please Donate Pot OP • 9h ago • I get that. Beforehand i've hinted at it multiple times, to no avail, so I guess it could come across a bit rɩ 'e, but I think I just got kind of tired by the multiple neglections to my hints
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    CuriousKiris 10h ago Edited 9h ago • NTA and good on you for setting a reasonable request. It's no more than they would have spent anyway, for greater comfort, convenience, and time saved. However, you've been sacrificing all of that this entire time, and it is going to be jarring to some folk when you no longer desire to do so.
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    Not a single offer to buy you a meal? Burger or a coffee? No thank you snacks from home to show appreciation? Nothing? That's wild.
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    Please DonatePot OP • 9h ago • Absolutely no offers.. I would've been more than happy, if I got offered a small sandwich or something.. But I did the math today, and I've spent roughly over 300€ through the last 6 months by simply giving them a 20km lift home almost daily
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    • Cool_Broccoli5441 10h ago • ΝΤΑ You're not their Uber or Lyft Don't be giving rides for free like that And yes, 15 minute detour after work is definitely a inconvenience
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    revanite3956 • 10h ago • Part ipant [1]. Doesn't matter whether it's a Bentley or a Pinto, NTA― you don't owe anyone a free ride.
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    Kalichun 5h ago Unfortunately people get ruffled when the gravy train stops. if you want a softer exit, you can tell people you need to do something in your own after work and don't have time to take them.
    via Kalichun
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    Vast-Tower2399 • 10h ago • Just stop with the rides. It's not trying to be a cab and asking for a couple bucks is not worth it. Just say you have to be home quicker now for x, y or z.
    via Vast-Tower2399
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    Only_Music_2640 • 9h ago • NTA for saying no, but NO is a complete sentence and the demand for compensation was over the top. Just say NO; you're under no obligation.
    via Only_Music_2640

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terrible coworkers aita workplace-stories employee job car work coworkers driving workplace entitled reddit thread Reddit money entitled people
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